Yes, You Can!

As I look over the last few months--and even the last 2 years, I realize that I've been slowly, but surely moving out of my uncomfortable comfort zone.

You're probably thinking: "What is an uncomfortable comfort zone?"  And even if you're not, I'm still gonna tell you anyway, lol.

The "Uncomfortable Comfort Zone" is a termed coined by Natalie Lue, who runs a successful blog called Baggage Reclaim--which Natalie describes as a "tongue-in-cheek guide created to discuss the complexities of being a woman, the choices they make, and the dodgy men that add to their load." 

Now, back to uncomfortable comfort zone: The uncomfortable comfort zone is a zone that you're very familiar with--it's something you know, something you're used to--but this zone causes you a lot of pain, anxiety, and stress. Even though you're somewhat comfortable because you're familiar with it, you're also really uncomfortable because your comfort zone is actually very unhealthy and causes a lot of discomfort. 

I've been in an uncomfortable comfort zone for a long time--my uncomfortable comfort zone is me being in toxic relationships/friendships, hiding who I am in an attempt to please others, not being honest with others about my thoughts, feelings, needs and wants so that I can "keep the peace" and other unhealthy behaviors and thinking patterns. But I think I'm finally taking steps (baby steps, but steps nonetheless) out of it and it's ridiculously scary because the things I feared are happening or may happen, but I'm learning that it's not the end of the world--in fact, it may be the beautiful beginning to a new world in which I am happy, healthy and loving myself the way God does.

So, I challenge you: Take that first step--tell that man/woman who doesn't treat you the way God does to get the steppin', block those toxic people from your social media and from calling you--don't allow them access to you and your life anymore, wear that outfit that people said you "shouldn't" wear, dance in public for the first time--just do the things that you know are good for you but you're too scared to do because it's not what you're used to. 

If you're like me and afraid that the world will end if you step out of your uncomfortable comfort zone, I'll leave you with a poem from poet Nayyirah Waheed:

"I don't pay attention to the

world ending.

It has ended for me

many times

and began again in the morning."

Love,

Jenai H.

Revive Me!

A lot of good things have been happening in my life.

I have not one, but two wonderful jobs. I've recently been accepted into graduate school for Mental Health Counseling. And I have finally started to work on a project that I'm passionate about (hinthint: Not of This World) and have an opportunity to try some new things before I start school in the Fall. Not only that, I have been blessed with a great support system.

But, for some reason, I am not really excited about life. I'll admit everything isn't perfect--I have been dealing with health issues that leave me feeling less than my best (I was only able to go to work one day this week because I had gotten so sick!), I am still struggling with anxiety from time to time, I'm working on removing toxic habits (thinking patterns, behaviors, beliefs etc.) and people from my life--it's a very difficult and scary process, and I'm fighting between pleasing others and being myself all of the time. It's hard and maybe, just maybe, these things are making it hard for me to be excited about my life.

My relationship with God feels distant. I don't really feel Him and I feel disconnected. I don't know what to do to reconnect myself back to Him. Even with prayer, devotionals, fellowship, I still don't feel Him, and as a result, I haven't been putting my all into my relationship with Him.

With all of this in mind, I have come to the decision to work on making some changes in my life. And since Lent started on Wednesday, I figured this is the perfect time to do so. I'm going to try to make healthier choices--sleeping at a regular schedule and making sure I get enough hours, choosing to eat healthy food more often, exercising regularly, asserting myself more and being honest with myself, as well as being honest with others, and really studying God's word. I also want to learn how to really listen to God and to study His word.

Now, I know, sometimes I just won't be feeling life. Sometimes I won't be on an emotional high--even with God. There will be dry seasons, difficult seasons, there will be seasons where the struggle is real--and. that's. okay. :) It's a part of life. We won't always feel as though we're on top of the world, and we may need to fall down and just lay there for awhile instead of instantly getting back up. But eventually, when it's time, we will get back up again and keep pushing forward.

I still need to rest some. I still need to let my mind, soul and body rest. But when the time comes--and it's coming soon!--I will get up and keep pushing forward.

Kindest Regards,

Jenai H.